Easing God Out
I have found through working the steps that I had a pride and ego problem. Me? Have a problem like that? Of course not. But as I soon got closer to the Third Step in the Big Book and 12X12 I realized it was so true. Releasing ego is not a simple step but it is a step that I can work on in my life on a 24 hour period. If I find myself getting defensive or feeling some type of guilt and refusing to face it, I’m full of ego. When I feel these feelings today I know there is some type of step work I must do to get through the process of releasing my ego and then letting go. When I’m aware of my character defects I can work on them. So when I find myself feeling selfish, self centered, self seeking, self pity, I most likely use the third step prayer to follow with letting go. This is not easy but with practice it become 2nd nature. I had to be willing to want to change because I was desperate enough. Besides, it’s really not just all about us. We must help another alcohol to truly be free. I love the zeal that new comers have when they have finally gotten it. You see a new freedom and happiness in them and they have no idea they have made changes. So with ego comes much practice learning that you are NOT the center of attention and not always is everything about you so dont take it too personal if you are a new comer around the tables.
Early on in my sobriety I was going to meetings and I wasn’t much of a talker. I would just sit and listen to the people talk and then all of a sudden I heard them speaking about situations I had been in and I thought “How do they know this about me”, “Did they call my family and get all this information on me”?
I was convinced that they were speaking to my family and friends and they were sharing all this information in the meetings when in fact they were speaking from their experiences, strength, and hope. So remember if you are a new comer, dont worry, no they did not contact your family or friends, they are just sharing from what they have experienced. Now you can relate.
God Speed my Brothers and Sister